There are some important things you need to know before losing your gay virginity!

A very important step is to put aside concepts like “gay”, “bi” or “queer”. Orientation is not the most important thing, but what you want and feel like!

You must be ready emotionally

Being emotionally prepared for this moment is crucial. Physically, it's easier to feel the click, but when it comes to emotions, it's a different story. If you don't feel ready, you could be using sex as a form of self-expression.

But, consider that very few can truly say that they have it all figured out and are completely comfortable with who they are. However, ask yourself if you are ready to start this adventure and face any challenges that come your way.

Forget the porn you watched

Don't wait for pornography to show you what sex is really like. Pono is a fantasy – unrealistic, edited, clean. In real life, nobody has sex that way.

Also, don't be in a hurry, especially with anal penetration. It might not work the first time you try. It requires a lot of trust and patience when you are starting out.

Try not to create expectations because it might not be so amazing the first time. Which is the most likely thing to happen. Unhurried!

Masturbation, oral sex or just some time to enjoy, everything is very good and important!

Hugging, massaging and kissing are great places to start.

You can also try sex toys to relax a little more. Realistic vibrators or prostate stimulators can be amazing. Or even the plugs that start in very small sizes and you can increase the sizes. They are very ergonomic and good for starters!

Having sex with another man does not (automatically) make you gay

Some men who have sex with other men are bi. Some still don't even know what they are and there's no problem with that. Don't worry about prejudices and labeling. When you're ready, you'll find the right word. Until then, don't be afraid to experiment and try sexual practices, as long as they are consensual!

Being passive can cause pain

It probably hurts the first time. If you don't use enough lube and go too fast, you could feel pain. You must start slowly and with some care. Silicone-based lubricants (which are safe with condoms) will help the most, and don't forget to take a break whenever you feel the need. And, there can be no harm in saying it!

Remember that passives need not be feminine, submissive or minor and actives need not be dominant or masculine. Roles only define what you are doing sexually, not your way of life or your behavior!

Many people like to be both passive and active, depending on the partner and the setting. If you're starting out, you can and should try both roles, because that's the only way you'll understand what you like best.

Not knowing what you want is good

Many people believe that they know their sexual preferences perfectly but most do not! So if you're a virgin, you can't really know!
You may not be sure, even if you've been sexually active for many, many years. Fantasies are one thing, but turning them into reality can be difficult, if not impossible.

He believes that few people know what they want when they start. Experience is what will help you to know.

Your sex life is all about yourself

Your sexual experiences are nobody's business. You don't need to share with others if you don't want to and don't feel like it.

Forget Slut-Shaming

There is no place for gay slut shaming in our community because there is no “healthy” or “right” number of times to have sex. Some people need more and some people need less. Having sex less often doesn't necessarily make a more secure partner. The important thing is to get tested for STDs regularly.

Always worry about IST's

Either sex puts you at risk for ISTs: HIV, gonorrhea, genital warts, to name a few. Some clinics are experienced in working with and treating gay men. Do not hide any symptoms of an infection from your doctor and report anything in your body that you believe could be related to an IST. And test yourself whenever possible.

Inlcusive, condoms are extremely important for anal sex. So you should always have at least one around.

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